What's in a Name?

Every child begins the world again.

Henry David Thoreau

Our little world has certainly been busy. In keeping with so many of my posts, let me start by apologizing for taking so long. I just have So. Much. To. Do. I've been plotting posts on not one, but two, baby showers; Christmas; and nesting. Those will come later, though. I'm learning to prioritize, and focusing again on being "good enough."


For today, I wanted to share two really important things: a name and a heartbeat. These two things are, for now, what makes our baby our baby. We can't see him or hold him, but we already love him. It's nice to be able to call him something special. His name is:

 *** Rory Arthur Hare ***

Rory is Scottish, and my first choice for a name. Arthur is Andrew's first choice, mainly after Art Blakey, the jazz drummer. There have been other Arthurs for Rory to look up to as well, including Arthur Ashe, the tennis player and civil rights activist.

If you would like to listen to Rory's heartbeat, you can do that HERE. We listened very carefully and figured out that this recording is about 143 beats per minute. For reference, here are a few songs with the same bpm. 

Wynton Marsalis - Memories of You

The Police - Message in a Bottle

And finally, for the usual updates: It's week 31 for me. That means baby is the size of a juicy and delicious pineapple. That's so big! I'm definitely starting to feel the effects of sharing my body with someone that big - heartburn and sore back. It's been fun to watch him squirm around though. My whole stomach moves when he gets excited, usually at night when I'm relaxing. 

We did have a small scare, because I was (and am) still under weight at my 28 week appointment, but we got an extra ultrasound, and Rory is measuring just fine. We were so grateful. I've been grateful, too, for increased energy. I am finally getting around to all the projects I was too tired to do before. 

First Photos

Here are the long awaited ultrasound photos. We are so happy to know that our little baby is growing just like he's supposed to, and everything looks good so far.

We saved the best one for last - look at his little face. And you can see his arm, too. During the ultrasound he was mostly napping, but he took a small break to play with his feet. Babies are so flexible! He had his feet right in front of his face and was grabbing them with both hands :)

Playlist for the Littlest Hare

Andrew here.  Now that baby has ears, it is time to share our music with him!  As mentioned in the last post I got to play for baby for the first time, and found out that we are having a healthy boy all in the last couple of days.  Right now I am feeling overwhelmed with gratitude and love, and to celebrate I wanted to share some highlights from the playlist I put together for the builder.  I tried not to over-think the list, and instead just filled it with music that is so meaningful to me that I couldn't wait to share until baby is born. 

Some Highlights From Builder Jams

Ahmad Jamal: "But Not For Me" from "Live at the Pershing"

This song seems to bury itself into your imagination the more you listen to it.  I love the hypnotic groove of this trio, and could imagine baby bouncing his big head along to it.

Art Blakey and Thelonious Monk: "Blue Monk" from "Art Blakey's Jazz Messengers With Thelonious Monk"

Two of my all-time favorite musicians playing one of my favorite songs = baby needs to hear!  Also, the sooner my son gets Blakey's press roll down, the better prepared for our drum lessons he will be (just kidding). 

Much more to come, enjoy!

Is That a Banana in Your Pocket?

Well, we've hit the 20 week mark as of tomorrow. Halfway done. We went to the big ultrasound today to check the baby's anatomy. I was really worried that we may have a little mutant, because we opted to forgo any genetic testing and I lost so much weight. Okay, just medium worried. But still, what a relief! Everything is normal.

The big news that everyone is most eager to hear is the baby's sex. We were excited to know, ourselves. Here we go:

We have some great images from the ultrasound that show our little guy in more detail, some in 3D even. I will post those once I can get to a scanner.

Baby is the length of a banana this week, and moving around a lot. I can feel him stretching, flipping, and kicking. If I'm sitting still, Andrew can feel too. Baby can also hear now. I went to a jazz club last night with some friends to hear Andrew play - the first jazz show for our little one! I'm sure that concerts will be more interesting when the baby doesn't have to listen underwater.

Holy Guacamole! It's Avocado Week!

Evening stroll along the Grand River, Grand Rapids, MI, after dinner with my grandparents.

I didn't post for a while, as you can see, because I didn't have much to say. I blew right through lemon week and orange week. It's hard being as sick as I was. But there's good news. The nausea seems to be done for the most part, and I'm eating again. All in all, I lost 20 lbs. I've been eating pumpkin cream cheese dip, soy chai lattes, and lots of avocado to try to gain some weight back.

It's fitting that I would be enjoying avocado so much right now, because that's about how big the baby is this week. She or he is starting to grow hair follicles and toe nails. Baby's kidneys have been working for a couple of weeks now, which means that baby can pee. In preparation, we bought some g diapers from a very nice family on Craigslist - just a few to try. Here's hoping they live up to the hype and work equally well with cloth or disposable inserts.

We did some traveling over the last two months that I haven't written much about. We took one long car trip to Michigan, and a short one to Connecticut. In Michigan, we met our friends' new baby, toured another friend's organic farm, ate some of my favorite Michigan foods, and visited with my family. All in all, it was a wonderful time. In Connecticut, we caught up with Andrew's family, shared lots of gross pregnancy news, and put together a showroom's worth of IKEA furniture, which made for another successful trip.

Andrew and Dee making their way to the shore at Saugatuck State Park, MI, after a nice walk through the woods.

Josh @ Soil Power Farm showing off his tomatillos. They were delicious! Hopefully the baby likes fruits and veggies as much as we do. We got to try Josh's potatoes, tomatoes, fancy lettuce, watermelon, yellow cucumbers, and lots more.

One last thing, if you want to make that delicious pumpkin cream cheese dip, here's the recipe. I gave it out a few years ago, but I don't expect people to hang on to things for that long. I know I don't.

Lindsy's Spectacular Pumpkin Dip

1 brick of cream cheese (full or reduced fat), softened

1/2 cup of canned pumpkin 

1/3 cup of brown sugar

Nutmeg to taste (a few shakes)

Maple (flavored) syrup to taste

- Dump everything in a mixing bowl and mix. I use a stand mixer every time.

- Start the mixer on slow and then build up to a medium high speed until smooth

- Add nutmeg and syrup to taste and blend on slow speed

- Dump in a bowl and refrigerate. Lick the spoon, the mixer attachment, and the bowl

- Use for dipping apples and pears, smear on bagels or pancakes, what ever you want

** Do not use Trader Joe's cream cheese. I don't know why, but it sucks. It will make your dip really runny. You want it to be almost mousse or pudding like when it's done.

It's Facebook Official

Well, we finally posted the good news on Facebook. That's the photo, at the bottom. For anyone under 30, that's when things get really serious.

Some highlights from the last few weeks: hearing the baby's heart beat at my most recent appointment (Andrew was there, too!), getting some gently used cloth diapers from another young family, and a lovely trip back to Michigan. I will post more about our trip and add some photos later.

For anyone who was wondering, I am slowly feeling better. I'm no longer coughing/sneezing/dripping from my nose and the nausea has gotten a little better each day. I'm really looking forward to feeling less "green" and doing a lot of serious eating. Gotta gain some weight!

The controversy about the baby's size continues again this week. Depending on which website I'm reading, the baby is either the size of a peach or a jumbo shrimp. That's even more disgusting than kidney bean. Here's a little chart of disgustingness: shrimp > kidney bean > lentil > any fruit ever. As usual, I'm going with the fruit option. Peach it is! Everyone please enjoy a fuzzy navel for me.

Week 11- Fig Week

It's been a little while since my last substantive post - mostly because I've been sick. I've been suffering from morning (and afternoon and night) sickness, and I'm also just getting over an awful sinus infection. I've lost 12 lbs during this trimester so far!

Desperate to cure my constant queasiness, I tried community acupuncture two weeks ago. Overall, it was really pleasant and relaxing. I met a friend there for moral support. We both chatted with the acupuncturist for a couple of minutes, got our needles, and then lounged on special zero gravity chairs in the community room. I didn't freak out about the needles at all (they're very small and thin), and I did feel better for a couple of days. I will probably go again.

As you can see, I've also been experimenting with my new camera. Andrew got it for me for my birthday, but we knew we would use it mostly for the little one. It's been fun following Fig around the house. He's very photogenic!

Speaking of figs, the baby is the size of a Fig this week. That seems huge compared to a lentil! The baby can move all around now that its arms and legs are developed - like underwater ballet - though I can't feel it. All of the baby's major organs are developed and his or her bones are starting to harden. Now it's time to grow. Hopefully that means I'll be hungry again soon. I'm still eating a lot of fruit, but I have to say one of the best things I've eaten in a while were some delicious pickles from Eastern Market during week 10. Look how happy I am!

Share Away!

The most recent appointment went just fine. For anyone who already knows, feel free to share. We're saving the all-important Facebook announcement for later, just fyi. I'm putting together a more detailed update, but I've been really sick, so it's taking some time.

Timing

We've been thinking a lot about timing lately. First, there's the timing of the baby's development during pregnancy. What a strange thing. We've found ourselves measuring our lives in weeks - we only get 40. Then there's the timing of my eating, which has been a challenge. Then the timing of the trimesters and the birth. Should we travel during my second trimester? What will we do about taking leave? There's a lot to think about.

The hardest part of the timing so far has been when to share the news. We've had to do a delicate balancing act with regard to the timing of telling everyone. On the one hand, we're really excited about share the news with everyone we know. On the other hand, there's a risk that something could go wrong and we could have shared too much too early. To that end, I know we've asked a lot of our close friends and family by telling you so early. It's hard to keep such good news to yourselves.

It's week 9 right now. The typical time to tell everyone is week 12, but you don't have to wait until then. I have an appointment in early August. If that goes well, we will post on the blog that it's safe to tell anyone you want to. We really appreciate your caring and support so far, and we can't wait to share the love!

P.S. The baby is the size of a green grape this week. Baby used to have a tail, but that's completely gone. Baby's heart has four distinct chambers, and he or she is starting to grow teeth.

Being Tired

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One of the less fun aspects of being pregnant is how much it wears you down.  Because your body is in the process of rearranging itself and building a baby, a great deal of the energy you are used to having available is just gone.

Lindsy and I had both read about this and expected it to happen in theory, but the reality is still strange and takes some getting used to.  I think this is especially unsettling since Lindsy is typically really high energy, and she loves to get stuff done.  I am just not used to seeing her get home from work and just collapse on the couch!

From my perspective, one cool thing about this lack of energy is that this is a reminder of the incredible things that must be going on inside of Lindsy.  I am trying to help out by doing more stuff around the house, but often I am stuck feeling powerless to help, and all I can really do is leave her alone to get some much needed sleep. 

The Controversy Continues...How Big is Baby?

It's week 8. The same popular website that told us two weeks ago our baby is the size of an adorable little sweet pea sent an e-mail this week to let us know that the baby is now the size of a raspberry. The website recommended by my doctor sent us an e-mail to let us know the baby is the size of....a kidney bean. Gross. Just to recap, their website went lentil, blueberry, kidney bean.

Speaking of gross, most food sounds disgusting to me these days. It's been a real struggle to eat (with the exception of Rainier cherries, which I can eat by the pound). No problems keeping anything down, just no desire to eat anything. Hopefully this will get better closer to the second trimester.

We are starting already to look into daycare. We are, apparently, almost behind on this. If you live in the city, it's not uncommon to put your name on waiting lists the morning after you conceive. Though we have little experience on this front, it seems to be going well. If we're lucky, we can secure a spot at one particular daycare we have in mind - diverse, close to my work, and very child-centered. More on this after we visit.

We are also considering pregnancy photos. These are getting more and more popular. Here's a link to some really big fails. We're thinking of recreating this one:

My "good enough" activities this week: lots of old tv shows, force feeding, and cherries.

Good News about a Sweet Pea

I had my first sonogram yesterday. We have a tiny heartbeat! It was so wonderful to see it for myself. Dr. Macri was great, and so patient while I rattled off my index card list of questions. The baby is measuring about 6 weeks and 4 days. Everything is on track. We're very relieved. It's wild to think about how powerful the technology must be to measure something that small.

How small? You might ask. Well, that's up for debate. One popular website says the size of a sweet pea. Cute, right? The other website says a lentil. Wholesome, but not particularly cute. I tried to summarize the controversy for Andrew. We are both squarely on the sweet pea side of things.

There are pictures from the sonogram, but they're really hard to make out. I doubt they would be special for anyone but us. So, I am not going to post them. I will put up the next ones for sure, though.

Lastly, I've been asked about morning sickness a lot in the last week or so. Yes, I'm suffering a little more now. I'm a little nauseous just about all of the time. Fruit and cream oatmeal has been my meal of choice over the last few days - any fruit but banana. Does anyone eat bananas and cream? If you do, please send me your address. We have a lot of bananas and cream packets floating around.

Good Enough - Words to Live By

I've been doing a lot of worrying and planning, even though it's only week 5. Some of it's fun and productive. Some not so much. It helps to see so many of our friends having healthy pregnancies and beautiful babies. Our friends welcomed a baby girl, Sofia, today. We couldn't be happier for them.

Like most 20-somethings who worry, I turned to the internet for a solution. This article about "perfect enough pregnancy" was just what I needed. With my first OBGYN appointment in 8 days, it's nice to focus on being just good enough. Not perfect. And once we hear the heartbeat at that appointment, it sounds like the chances of miscarriage go down to something like 5%. I can live with that
 
A great discovery this week: our pool pass to the neighboring high rise gets us into the fitness center. Great news for my butt, which could use some time on the machines. Oh, and my heart, which has to be healthy for the baby. That too.

My "good enough" activities: eating lots of sugar snap peas, lounging by the pool, working out covertly in the "new" fitness center, drinking the occasional cup of coffee without guilt, taking naps upon naps, and trolling the internet for feel-good articles about pregnancy.

What About the Adoption?

Because we have been so open about beginning the adoption process a year ago, some of you may be wondering what happened. Unfortunately, like many hopeful parents, we experienced a setback on our first try. We had to give up on the process because we could no longer work with the agency. We simply didn't trust them any more.

In addition, we found out in February that I was pregnant. It was an "oops" baby, but we were happy about starting our family one way or the other. Then, the same week we found out I was pregnant, I had a miscarriage. It was difficult, but it made it very obvious to us that it was time to have a child of our own if we could. We are still planning to adopt one day. Our commitment is there, and there will always be a need for adoptive families. We're just taking a slight detour - like 9 mos or so.

We decided to share this so that everyone can understand exactly how happy we are to be trying again, and to thank everyone for their support during the adoption process. Adoption really can be a first choice. It just didn't work out for us. Also, it seems that it's not very popular to share sad news, especially when it comes to miscarriages. I wanted to be honest about what starting a family really looks like, for those who have gone through or may go through the same things

Here's to the next 8 months of adventure and a future older sibling! We have big plans!

Week Four - Little Baby. Big Secret.

It's week 4. A and I just got back from Aunt Marian's memorial in Boston.  This weekend was a great tribute to Marian's life and what her family called a "legacy of love." It's strange when life is ending and beginning at the same time. We told our parents I am pregnant over the weekend, but we're keeping the news close for now. We really want this new little life to thrive.

The "baby" is actually just a collection of cells - about the size of a poppy seed. Still big enough to be excited about. I've been tired, and craving carbs. Today, A made a delicious dinner of pasta with yellow squash, garlic, basil, lemon juice, and pecorino romano. It was so much better with basil straight from our little patio garden.

I'm looking forward to seeing my family in Michigan in July, and my first OBGYN appointment. I will get an ultrasound before I can actually see the doctor. This was the same doctor I saw after the miscarriage in February, so at least we are already acquainted.